Pedge… I need to ask you something, if I may… … …

Comment on A Comparison of Fast Food Fried Fish Sandwiches by EcurbTProphet.

Pedge… I need to ask you something, if I may…

… When I stop by a fast-food place it’s because I am away from home, so, it would be difficult for me to put a deep fryer in my car… not impossible, but difficult. The oil would splash around, you know.

How did you do it? How did you cook those fish sandwiches in your vehicle. Oh, wait… you did it at HOME.

Never mind.

EcurbTProphet Also Commented

A Comparison of Fast Food Fried Fish Sandwiches

(Never mind… my comment would be hidden!)

(too funny)

A Comparison of Fast Food Fried Fish Sandwiches
Rose is right.

Arby’s better fish sandwich, and no, you won’t find the fish on sale in the south… they go too fast, no reason to discount.

But Rose… come on… in Italy… even the pizza con frutti di Mare (fruit of the sea)… NO cheese with fish… NO CHEESE with fish… not done. Take off the cheese, cut the filet a little thicker… actually make it a filet, as opposed to sliced minced fish cake.

Now, Rose… you gotta agree with me on this one.

A Comparison of Fast Food Fried Fish Sandwiches
A paid advertisement – that’s all I can say.

That’s what this article was – a paid advertisement, in much the same way that Motor Trend Magazine issues their “Car of the Year” awards… by highest bidder.

Clearly, this person has no taste.

McDonald’s Filet-O-Fish has cheddar CHEESE on it (cheese on fish?), WAY too much tartar sauce (purposely to disguise the minced fish taste), sits under a heat lamp, and is mostly breading. (Where’s the fish?)

It is MY favorite McDonald’s sandwich, but that’s not saying much.

Arby’s is the clear taste winner – which could be concluded with more than a single visit on which to base your decision. On any one occasion something could go wrong. So, you make several trips in order to mitigate those things that could (and do) go wrong at a fast-food place.

Wendy’s is second.

BK… I have yet to find a BK with the fish sandwich on their menu – not all restaurants have all items on their menu.

AS WELL… due to unpopular demand, both Arby’s and Wendy’s restaurants are intermittent about offering their fish sandwiches – saying it is either, “seasonal,” or simply, “discontinued.”

I guess Americans just don’t like fish sandwiches.

So it is only by DEFAULT that McDonald’s wins this competition… and that saddens me greatly.

There are no more Long John Silvers… all the Skippers are closing… Arby’s and Wendy’s are discontinuing their fish sandwiches, Burger King can’t decide if it brings back the Whaler or not. (The Whaler… now THAT was a fish sandwich!)

All we are left with is the Filet-O-Fish.

So… Mickey D… could you do us all a favor… take off the cheese and half the tarter sauce, improve the breading, slice your (minced fish cake) “filet” a little bit thicker, and DEEP FRY them to order – in oil that is ONLY used for fish.

We FISH SANDWICH lovers will absolutely wait for one… we will. We WILL wait. Which means… no, you can’t sell them in the drive-through.

Well, I guess we found the problem.

It’s not that Americans don’t like fish sandwiches… Americans won’t get their fat butts out of their cars and waddle up to the counter, AND WAIT, for a good sandwich. They’ll just take the swill that gets put in the trough as they drive by.

Geez… what’s next… moving troughs? (Hmmm… I may be on to something!)

Malcolm Bedell is co-author of the critically acclaimed "Eating in Maine: At Home, On the Town, and On the Road," as well as the junk food blog "Spork & Barrel," and "Brocavore," a blog about food trucks and street food culture. His contributions include Serious Eats, Down East, Eat Rockland, L.A. Weekly, The Guardian, and The Huffington Post and his food truck, "'Wich, Please," was named "Hottest Restaurant in Maine" for 2015 by Eater. Finally, he finds it very silly to be trying to write this in the third person.